I ranked 99th in my town at the summer fair last summer I can't knith wortha shit

Am I deranged for thinking it would be kind of funny to watch someone on speed knitting during their entire tweak?

Well, I did teach some knitting when I was a youngster. Dunno if I remember anything of it now. lol

There was only 31 people in the contest

if there was 31 in the contest and you ranked as 99. Then you should be arm and legless to aquire that rank! hehe

I was half drunk

how can anyone be half drunk? either you sober or youre drunk.... The drunkeness just varies in stages. very little drunk to extremely drunk and lastly dead drunl. The last one is bad for your health.....

I only had a couple of beers, it was still early. by 11 o clock i was extremely dead drunk