POST YOUR JOKES HERE
Hahahahahahaha! This is hilarious! I love the "I'm really happy for you, and I'm gonna let you finish your search, but did you mean: Beyonce".
lol that was funny
Blonde Diary:
January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.
Helllloooo!!! bottles won't fit in typewriter!
March - Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6
months.....box said "2-4 years!"
April - Trapped on an escalator for hours.....power went out!
May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....8 cups of water
won't fit into those little packets!
June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, the
other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!
August - Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....car swamped because
soft-top was open.
September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it?
November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days.....instructions said 1 hour per
pound and I weigh 108 lbs!
December - Couldn't call 911....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on
the stupid phone!
The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly:
Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids
Bad: You can't find your birth control pills
Ugly: Your daughter borrowed them
Good: You give the birds and bees talk to your daughter
Bad: She keeps interrupting
Ugly: With corrections
Good: You're son is dating someone new.
Bad: It's another man.
Ugly: He's you're best friend.
RAUNCHY. NASTY HUMOR.
This hobo runs into a bar and almost crashes into the bar trying to get the barman's attention.
"Please! I need a toothpick!!"
The barman scrambles and gives him a toothpick since it looks so freakin urgent. Hobo runs out, bumping into a second hobo who's also running in.
"Tell me you have a toothpick!! PLEASE!"
The barman give the second hobo a toothpick also. As soon as he wrapped his dirty fingers around it the hobo ran right out the door.
Barman looks at one of the regs, scratchin his head. "What the hell was that for?"
Then enters a third hobo, this one looking a bit defeated as he approaches the bar.
"Sorry, you wouldn't happen to have a sippy-straw?"
Barkeep looks at him trying to understand. "Don't you mean a toothpick, like your buddies?"
No no, I mean a straw. See, some guy puked outside, and them other two guys got the best bits."
Hahaha, very nice
Hi Kingtommy im sorry but im not with that Joke can you tell me whats the Joke thanks.
Haha Owen, this is your 2nd post within 5 minutes of not understanding one's humor.
I can understand maybe the last post..n how u didnt get her humor..but how can u miss this bro
Hi sorry to all Blondes i may ofend in the progress of telling these Jokes :
Q. Did you hear about the new blonde paint?
A. It's not real bright, but its cheap, and spreads easy.
A nose walks into a bar and asks for a drink.
The bartender says, "Sorry, I can't serve you. You're already off your face
Q. What did the blonde's left leg say to her right leg?
A. Between the two of us, we can make a lot of money.
Q. Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A. Because that's where your supposed to wash vegetables
Q. What's a blondes favorite nursery rhyme?
A. Humpme Dumpme
Q. Why did the blonde like the car with a sunroof?
A. More leg-room!
Q. Why don't blondes use vibrators?
A. They chip their teeth.
Thank You Thank You for your Aplause